Sunstone has been around for long enough that you can uncover various technological eras by going through our basement and attic. For example, this strange machine that could send documents over telephone wires. Amazing, huh?
And you could store up to 1.3 megabytes worth of information on this small square. As you can see, Michael Austin sent in three entire articles on a single disc!
You could fold hundreds of sheets of paper in minutes with this doohickey.
And make buttons that say anything you want with this.
Truly, those were glorious days.
And now for the sneakiest Sunstone ad of all time.
Why was this Sheraton ad, picturing beautiful people lounging in swimwear by a pool, sneaky? Well, it just so happened that Sunstone was holding its Salt Lake Symposiums there. Who could resist the possibility of an event with both Mormon scholarship and the flesh pots of Egypt?
Speaking of which, we now come to the highest point of culture ever achieved within the pages of Sunstone. The personal ads.
Yes, friends, Sunstone was trying to get its subscribers together to make future Sunstone subscribers. And the results were astonishing.
Consider these spirit-filled invitations: “Used Husband. Excellent Condition.”
“Are you male, over 30, and normal?” (Sunstone subscribers often met two of the three criteria.)
“Tall Intellectual Nature Boy, 30, slender, seeks liberated and liberal female for friendship, movies, conversation, and …?”
“Looking for an open and honest independent, professional woman who has almost worked through guilt maze.”
Some people got right to the point. “LDS professional man seeks a tall, attractive, sensitive, affectionate, good figured professional female. Prefer never married. Please send photo.” What a catch he’d be!
I don’t know, do you think he’d go for “Gorgeous, vivacious woman seeks total heretic with zest for life”?
Or maybe “Vavavoom! Young at 40!”
Or possibly, “LDS lady, 30, likes history, Hitchcock, and Huey Lewis.” (And copyediting.)
But the winner of the Sunstone personals contest could only be “Male ascetic, 31, 5’3”, who is willing to relinquish his vows of celibacy for the right Spiritually Mature Maiden.”
And in case your Sunstone ad did not find the—from most to least important—good figured, normal, spiritually mature date you hoped for, Sunstone provided, for only the price of a magazine, a list of LDS single adult hotlines from across the continent. Even the one for Meridian, Idaho!
Or you could join Boldstep, which offered to connect you with someone to share a quiet evening with, a day of fishing, or …
(It is with great sadness that I inform you that Elbert Peck, one of the editors of Sunstone while the personals were going, told me that the ads featured in this post were not from real people. They were, instead, written by the staff to prime the pump. This has been a terrible blow to my testimony. I may never recover.)
